Special Feature: Test Your Auditory Stamina

Yes, we won.  Yes, it was personal. And yes, it felt really, really good.

But this takes away almost all of my happiness. /runs away sobbing.

Author’s Visual Processing Review – Georgia Florida Overtime

Man on man if only the Gators would miss this thing
We could win the East if the Dawgs could play defense
Man that Richt is a strange dude, wonder if they will can him?

 

What exactly is wrong with his hair, by the way? Never thought I would say this, but dude needs to comb-over
Wait, what's that dude back there doing? Isn't that Grantham?
Is his throat sore? Is it an alignment signal? Is he teasing Rainey about his girlfriend?
Oh. My. God. He's taunting the Florida kicker. Unbelievable

SEC Weekly Bowl Projections

High Point of the Bowl-That-Must-Not-Be-Mentioned

With its 38-24 victory over the Tennessee Volunteers, South Carolina is bowl-eligible for the seventh consecutive year.  The days where bowl eligibility were an unattainable goal for the season seem like a distant memory now, which is a testament to how far we’ve come as a program the importance of a twelve game season.

SO, with that milestone crossed, let’s look at TRC’s Weekly (NEW FEATURE!) SEC Bowl Projections:
BCS Title Game:  Auburn vs. Oregon – Auburn has Fairy Magic on its side and will remain winfull (which is the opposite of winless).
Allstate Sugar Bowl: LSU vs. TCU – physical defenses and low-brow tailgating (you thought I was gonna say “offenses” didn’t you?)
Capitol One Bowl: Alabama vs. Ohio State – The Boredom Bowl, The Serious Coach Bowl, The Felony Doesn’t Make You Ineligible Bowl
Cotton Bowl: Mississippi State vs. Missouri – The Ugly Stepsister of the Conference Bowl.  Maybe the Big 12 10 and the SEC should just make them play each other 12 times a year.
Outback Bowl: Florida vs. Michigan State – because they play each other in this bowl every year or at least it seems like it.  What?  They never have?  Well, they should.
Chick-fil-a Bowl: Anyone-But-South-Carolina-No-Matter-How-Much-We-Have-to-Torture-the-Logic (Publically, the committee will simply say ‘Arkansas’) vs. Florida State.
Gator Bowl: South Carolina vs. Wisconsin – Logistics Man wants easy trip to Jax.
Music City Bowl  [South Carolina sneers and quietly judges you in much the same way you treated us last year]: Georgia vs. Maryland – because Georgia always gets a cupcake for Christmas.
Liberty Bowl: Kentucky vs. Houston.  Sponsorship opportunity for Red Lobster Cheesy Biscuits pending selection.

SEC East Race – Graphic Explanation – UPDATED UPDATED UPDATED

And Then There Were Two

This One’s Personal

I’m not sure when it started.  Maybe it was in 1992 when former walk-on Hank Campbell dropped UT just short of that game-tying 2 point conversion.  That loss ultimately knocked the Vols out of the SEC East race that year, so it must have hurt.  Maybe that was the beginning, but regardless, it always seems like the Volunteers particularly enjoy smacking South Carolina down.  The numbers don’t help the perception, as Carolina has only defeated Tennessee three times since joining the conference.
But it goes deeper than the records.  Tennessee has made many a career by stealing our best players and then beating us with them.  It’s no secret that former head coach Philip Fulmer liked to raid the state for talent, and it’s also no secret that our coaches fought him tooth and nail.  But regardless, the pattern established itself throughout the last two decades:  Tennessee took the best two or three players from the state, and South Carolina was left to divide the scraps with C.T.U.
Just take a look at the following short (and not nearly exhaustive) list: Shaun Ellis, Dominique Stevenson, Darwin Walker, Albert Haynesworth, Jon Hefney, Anthony McDaniel, Eric Young, Robert Ayers.  All from South Carolina.  All spurned the home state school to play for the Volunteers.  Most, if not all, went on to NFL careers.
[Speaking of Haynesworth, he will always be a pariah to Gamecock fans.  No one will forget how he stood victorious in the end zone that year at Williams Brice and taunted our departing fans while waving a UT flag.  It was classless, but it also particularly stung like a betrayal.]
The SC to UT pipeline was so understood, so part of the southern football landscape, that when Derek Watson spurned the Volunteers and signed with Lou Holtz’s Gamecocks, the UT coaching staff assumed that major NCAA violations were involved.  After years of NCAA scrutiny brought about by Fulmer’s report, no major violations were uncovered (I think maybe Buddy Pough bought Derek a burger at the Williamston McDonalds when he shouldn’t have or something, but still).
Then came the defection of our former Recruiting Coordinator David Reeves.  One day he was recruiting for us, and the next he was calling those same recruits and telling them Carolina was all wrong for them.  Again, maybe it was part of his job, but for sensitive Carolina fans, it was another betrayal and another attempt to keep the UT jackboot on our state’s neck.
As a culmination of years of insults and defeats (both on the field and in the recruits’ living rooms), UT coaching wunderkind Lane Kiffin was overheard telling then-highschooler Alshon Jeffrey that if he went to South Carolina he “would pump gas for the rest of his life.”
To Carolina fans it felt like the nuclear option of insults, despite the fact that it backfired and Jeffrey signed with USC.  The slight was all over the media, and stays with us still in the football zeitgeist even though young Kiffin fled to the west coast soon thereafter.
Then we saw the photo from the Byrnes High School game.  You know the photo.  The one with Corey Miller and the young ladies in it.
 I, for one, understood the photo to be further evidence of just how far Tennessee would go to keep Carolina down.
So just after noon this Saturday, when toe meets leather and another UT-SC matchup begins, I want you to know this, Coach Dooley:  you and your orange-clad soldiers are about as welcomed in Williams Brice as, let’s see, I’m looking for a historical analogy . . . . . . . . .  

Sunday Night Snark, Monday Afternoon Q&A Edition

Question:  How many CTU players does it take to operate an elevator?
Answer:  More than twelve.
Question:  How many Offensive Coordinators does it take for Vandy to win a conference game?
Answer:  More than three.
Question:  How many years has it been since the Baylor Bears were ranked in the top 25 went to a bowl game?
Answer: More than sixteen.
Question:  What needs to happen for the Kentucky Wildcats to win the SEC East (Cheesy Biscuits not accepted as an answer)?
Answer:   South Carolina loses to Tennessee and Arkansas AND Georgia loses to Florida and Auburn, AND Florida loses to South Carolina and Vanderbilt.  Oh, AND Kentucky has to win out.  Oh, AND Hell has to freeze over.
Question:  What was so hard about getting out of that two floor elevator in Clemson, SC?
Answer: Confusing Control Panel

SEC East Race, A Graphic Explanation – Life of Pi Edition, UPDATED, UPDATED

And Then There Were Three

More Fun With Venn Diagrams – CTU Edition

CTU Football History Explained
Fanbase Snapshot
Null Set re: Dabo Swinney's Hygiene Habits

TRC Internet Meme Tutorial

As a public service to those of you struggling with the series of tubes that is the internet, we occasionally offer explanations for viral internet phenomena.

This week, we will look at the Venn Diagram Meme

Venn diagrams are graphic representations of relationships between sets of data.  Put another way, a Venn diagram shows you a picture of how two or more groups of things are related. 

Multiple uses in statistics, education, science, etc., and also now an internet phenomenon.

The meme associated with Venn diagrams usually involves a humorous twist or cynically profound point in the apparent association of the data sets.

An example:

Gamecock 2010 Season

SEC East, A Graphic Explanation, Life of Pi Edition UPDATED

"All In" (can't believe I just quoted Dabo)