If you saw the Orange Bowl preview on ESPN, you saw Dabo’s hidden talent – dancing.  If you did not see it…THEN SET YOUR EYES TO STUN…

Snap judgments isn’t very snappy since almost a full day has passed since our Cap One Bowl victory. But hey, I had a house full of people already ragging me for paying more attention to Twitter than them, so I had to preserve some sort of familial peace and postpone the column until today.

With that said, here are some quick, barely researched, not fully formed thoughts on yesterday’s win, the ELEVENTH of the season for the Gamecocks:

The Head Ball Coach.  After losing to UConn at a miserably cold third-tier bowl game on January 2, 2010, you had to wonder.  The 34-17 thrashing of rival CTU a month earlier was well in the rear view mirror. South Carolina’s final record was 7-6. The years before that were similarly mediocre – 7-6, 6-6, 8-5, 7-5.

Sure, relatively speaking that was progress, and there were glimpses of hope. But the promise of SEC and national football relevance under Steve Spurrier seemed as far away as it was the day he took the job. And we all wondered – if Steve Spurrier can’t get the job done here, then who can?   

On January 2, 2012, Steve Spurrier and South Carolina realized that promise of relevance.  Actually, South Carolina has achieved relevance BECAUSE of Steve Spurrier. 

In the two years since that brutal loss to UConn, the coach and the school have an SEC East title, a 9-win season, a win over #1-ranked Alabama, two convincing wins over CTU, numerous wins over traditional SEC powers Georgia, Tennessee and Florida, and now an 11-win season, a top 10 ranking in the final polls and the title of greatest Gamecock team ever.

Steve Spurrier appeared to choke up a little in his post-game interview with ESPN yesterday when talking about this team’s accomplishments, and Spurrier is not the type of guy to choke up. Period. I think even he realizes the magnitude of what he has been able to achieve with this program.  And the good news is he seems determined to achieve more. 

A lot more.     

Still the 1.  Alshon Jeffery ended his South Carolina career in style.  Well, sort of. 

He was on his way to a legendary day with four catches for 148 yards and one TD through two and a half quarters when a heated scuffle broke out with Nebraska corner Alfonzo Dennard.  Two punches by Dennard and a shove by Jeffery resulted in both players being ejected.

It was pretty obvious from the start that Nebraska’s plan was to get physical with Alshon and get him frustrated.  I doubt it was their plan to get him ejected, but by the time it happened, he had already done his damage.  

It’s a shame for Alshon because he deserved to be on the field during the historic win.  But he was somewhat vindicated when the media voted him game MVP, a signal that not just Gamecock fans thought his ejection was unjust. 

As for Mr. Dennard, if he truly is the NFL prospect ESPN says he is, he better learn to keep his hands off receivers after that first five yards or he will be a penalty machine in The League.  

No EJ, no problem.  I was afraid of Nebraska’s run game heading into the Capital One Bowl, and then after they scored on their first possession (on a pass, oddly enough) I was even more afraid.  One of the people I was watching the game with even said “Ellis Johnson”, with no additional commentary.

But Lorenzo Ward’s troops recovered and played lights out after the Huskers’ first possession of the second half, holding them to 64 total yards in the half.  One amazing statistic was that after Jeffery was ejected, Nebraska ran 11 plays for -22 yards.

I think we’re in good hands.

Melvin Ingram and Travian Robertson.  Thank you, and good luck in the NFL.

Jadeveon Clowney. Uh, yeah, that guy is good.  

Kenny Miles. What an unexpected boost from #31 in the last two games.  I hope he returns, and I think he will, but he’ll once again be battling for the #2 spot at best against Shon Carson, Brandon Wilds and incoming freshman Kenrick Salley.  However, two of those guys (Carson, Salley) will be coming off knee surgery (as well as Marcus, obviously), so it sure would be nice to have Miles on the roster.     

The Marcus Effect. Remember the big knock on this team heading into the season?  “The offense IS Marcus Lattimore, if they lose him…”

Honestly, it was hard to argue at the time based on how we played when he was injured in 2010.  But this year guys stepped up, the offense found continuity, and now the future for the Gamecock offense is brighter than ever.

Can you imagine what our offense would’ve been like WITH Marcus in the lineup? 

Shaw and Co.  We’ve been saying it for a while now, and it’s still a little hard to believe – no Lattimore, no Garcia, and a sub-par season from Jeffery and we still go 11-2.  Kudos to Connor Shaw, the guy who not only kept this offense together, but was the catalyst for quite a bit of success on the offensive side of the ball.

Bo Pelini. Mr. Road Rage still thinks his guys are better than ours. 

I’ll say it straight out — our football team, even after the game felt we were a better football team than them.

Right.

Special teams.  Our ST have not been good at all this year, but yesterday was abysmal.  Penalty on a punt return that leads to a Husker TD, horrendous punting, missed 20-yard FG, THREE penalties on another punt return, zero kickoffs that come close to reaching the end zone…please check the box that says “NEEDS WORK”.

Top 10 finish.  Just to reiterate – South Carolina will finish in the Top 10 in the rankings for the first time ever.  That’s pretty sweet.

The Rumor Mill.  From the FWIW Department – the hot rumors today are Stephon Gilmore has decided to enter the draft, while Shawn Elliott is a leading candidate for the Appalachian State job. 

Our reaction to the Gilmore news? Meh, OK, kinda figured.

Our reaction to the Elliott news?  NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

GO DWAGS. For you folks that pull for the SEC out of conference pride, I admire you and really don’t have a beef with it. But I only pull for Georgia against CTU, so the end of yesterday’s Outback Bowl was SOOO much fun to watch.  Also fun – watching my co-workers sulk around like their dog died.  Which I guess in this instance, it kinda did…

Please join us for TRC Unleashed – Episode 16 on Thursday, December 29 at 6 p.m. This will be our final episode of 2011, and we’ll be discussing the upcoming Capital One Bowl against Nebraska, the newly released SEC schedule for 2012, and some of the memorable plays and players from the Gamecocks’ 10-2 regular season.

We look forward to talking at you then.

Well, the holiday depression is now in full swing – the day after Christmas, almost a full week to New Year’s, boring no-name teams playing in boring strangely named bowl games, cold, wet winter weather – ugh, it almost makes you want to sleep until about 6 p.m. on December 31. Well folks, today I have good news for you – it’s time for the first annual TRC Gamecock Football Superlatives!

Now calm down and don’t read through these too fast. It’s like that present you couldn’t wait to open yesterday, so you tore through it like Travian Robertson through the CTU offensive line, except you didn’t get the satisfaction of a sack dance. (OK, maybe a few of you did do a sack dance because that’s how you roll, but I digress.)

So take your time to savor these people and moments from a very special 2011 Gamecock football season.

Plays of the Year

Defensive Play of the Year – Jadeveon Clowney came to South Carolina more hyped than any player in its history, and showed why late in the fourth quarter of his second career game against Georgia.  With the Gamecocks hanging on to a three-point lead with a little over three minutes to go, Clowney came through the UGA offensive line unblocked, grabbed quarterback Aaron Murray by the jersey and slung him to the ground like a rag doll.  The sheer force of the sack separated Murray from the ball, and big Melvin Ingram scooped and scored for a 45-35 South Carolina lead. That would be the deciding score in a 45-42 win in Athens, the ‘Cocks second straight over the Bulldogs.  Honorable Mention: Antonio Allen’s interception return for TD against UGA; Devin Taylor’s interception return for TD against Arkansas; D.J. Swearinger’s game-saving interception against Mississippi State; pretty much any sack against Tajh Boyd and CTU.

Offensive Play of the Year – The Gamecocks were on the verge of a devastating loss in Starkville against Mississippi State, trailing 10-7 when they took over on offense midway through the fourth quarter.  Connor Shaw took the team on a methodical drive down the field and had them in position for at least a tying field goal, facing a third and goal at the four yard line.  Alshon Jeffery had only 20 yards receiving up to that point in the game, but with Marcus Lattimore sidelined with what turned out to be a season-ending knee injury, Jeffery was the obvious option, as evidenced by the Bulldogs double coverage on him.  Shaw lofted the ball towards the corner, and Jeffery out-jumped two MSU defenders for the winning score.  (Scrub video to the 2:10 mark.) Honorable Mention: Stephen Garcia’s first TD run against ECU; Marcus Lattimore’s 52-yard catch and run TD against Vandy; Bruce Ellington’s 61-yard run for TD against Kentucky; Connor Shaw’s 60-yard TD run against The Citadel; Alshon Jeffery’s TD catch against CTU.

Special Teams Play of the Year – Also the overall play of the year, you didn’t really think I was going to leave this one out did you?  Not only is this the play of the year, I’d dare say it’s a serious contender for play of the decade in USC football.  It is certainly a great play in and of itself, but it also came at a critical time in the Georgia game when the Bulldogs had seized momentum.  The play was a message from Steve Spurrier that we were going to do whatever it took to win, and we needed every break we could get that day.  It is also the only single play in over thirteen months of TRC blogging that deserved it’s own post.  Honorable Mention:  Ace Sanders’ 68-yard punt return for TD against ECU; Jay Wooten’s 49-yard field goal against UGA; Ingram’s leap and grab of a UGA onside kick.

Drive of the Year – A 20-play, 98-yard touchdown drive against Tennessee epitomized what kind of team and program South Carolina is becoming.  A drive like that against UT in Neyland Stadium would have been unthinkable just a couple of years ago, but this team showed serious heart, determination and talent that night.  Honorable Mention: The aforementioned 12-play, 79-yard drive against MSU; a critical 9-play, 60-yard drive just before half against CTU after they had tied the score 10-10.

Players of the Year

Team Most Valuable Player – Melvin Ingram. What a ride for this kid. I’m only going by memory, but I believe he came to USC as a linebacker and spent a little time at fullback before settling into the defensive line rotation.  It took him some time to learn the nuances of the DL, but once he did, boy did he make a difference.  You saw glimpses of it last year, and his freakish athletic ability jumped out at everyone who saw him play this year.  He’s had the tag “unblockable” placed on him, he’s intercepted passes, ran fake punts, been a mentor to young guys like Jadeveon Clowney, and I’m sure at some point he’s washed towels and handed out Gatorade.  A consensus first-team All-American, Melvin will be a first-round draft pick and will go down as one of the Gamecocks’ greatest ever.

Defensive Player of the Year – Antonio Allen. Led the team with 81 total tackles and tied for the lead with three interceptions. Allen always seems to make a play when the Gamecocks need him most. Unheralded when he got to South Carolina (heck, even unheralded coming into this season) Allen matured into an All-SEC performer and will be an NFL draft pick in the spring.

Offensive Player of the Year – Connor Shaw. With the trio of Garcia, Lattimore and Jeffery on the team, it was impossible to see this coming. But when Garcia was benched and then dismissed, Shaw stepped in and guided the team to six wins in seven games, and only the second 10-win season in school history. He was solid and rarely spectacular, until the last game of the season that is, when he dumped the Shaw kitchen sink on CTU and gave Gamecock fans reason to be very optimistic about the quarterback position for the next two years. Shaw completed 63 percent of his passes and threw for 12 TD’s, and gave the Gamecocks a controlled running threat from the position once he got comfortable.  The one thing he did not do that was a pleasant surprise – make backbreaking mistakes.

Special Teams Player of the Year – Vacant. Oh, ok, if I have to pick somebody let’s go with…uh…Jay Wooten.  Congratulations Jay.

Freshman of the Year – Jadeveon Clowney. Really an easy pick and I don’t think I have to rehash why. All I know is he is going to be a beast for the next two years at USC.  I’d be remiss without acknowledging the contributions of newcomers Brandon Wilds, Mike Matulis, Bruce Ellington, Buster Anderson, Kelcy Quarles and Victor Hampton.  The Gamecock football program will be in good hands with these guys over the next few years.

Coaches of the Year Not Named Spurrier

Offensive Coach of the Year – Shawn Elliott. The South Carolina offensive line has been a problem since Steve Spurrier’s arrival in 2005. But this year Shawn Elliott patched together a group that should be talked about for one primary reason – because nobody talked about it. There were times when the OL didn’t play particularly well, it happens, but those moments were much fewer and farther between than recent years.  Under Elliott’s tutelage, and with the young talent we have returning on the line, look for the OL to be a strength instead of a weakness going forward.

Defensive Coach of the Year – Ellis Johnson. This guy has gotten it done with many teams over many years, but this might have been his best coaching job. Granted, he had a lot of talent to work with, but he also had a hand in recruiting the talent to fit his system. After a rough first two games, the South Carolina defense rebounded and is now mentioned in the same breath as National Championship contenders Alabama and LSU. Johnson’s defense held two teams under 100 total yards (Vanderbilt, Kentucky) and two more teams under 200 total yards (Tennessee, CTU). He will be a tough man to replace.

If you would’ve asked me a month ago if Ellis Johnson would be a candidate for the Southern Mississippi head coaching job I would’ve said no way. If you would’ve asked me if he would want it even if offered I would’ve told you no way. But coaches in general are a nomadic bunch, and the more I look at the situation, the more it makes sense.

It’s easy to be tempted by the young offensive coordinator with the flashy “new” system, but Southern Miss didn’t want to be the proverbial stepping stone that many mid-major schools are. USM has had only two coaches in 21 years, Jeff Bower and Larry Fedora – Bower for 18 and Fedora for three. Now, the 59-year-old Johnson surely will not be at USM for anywhere near 18 years, but he will also not be looking to move on to the next big thing if he has success. It’s very easy to see EJ finishing his career at USM, and I hope he has enough success to make that a reality.

From Johnson’s side of things, a lot of people cited his satisfaction with his position at USC and his wife’s business as reasons for him to stay. But ultimately Johnson wanted to be a head coach again, and with Steve Spurrier’s recent contract extension it didn’t look like he would even have the opportunity to become head coach at South Carolina for at least 4-5 years.

I’m frankly impressed that Southern Miss was open to hiring Johnson, and that Johnson was able to convince the USM brass that he was the man for the job.

As South Carolina fans, all we can do is tip our hat to EJ for the job he has done here, turning the USC defense into one of the elite units in the nation. Not bad for guy who wasn’t Spurrier’s first choice.

Good luck Coach Johnson.

Who’s Next? Already people are speculating on who the next South Carolina defensive coordinator will be. Here are four names that have been mentioned, with only one I believe to be a true possibility:

• Mike Stoops – late of Arizona, currently unemployed. Rumors are he’d like to reunite with brother Bob at Oklahoma, but there are no openings on his staff at the moment and he’s not willing to re-shuffle without a departure. Spurrier obviously has connections to the Stoops family, and this might be a viable option.
• Randy Shannon – the former Miami coach would be an excellent choice for many reasons, but is a bad choice for one reason – the NCAA investigation at Miami. At this point, whether he’s guilty or not, we don’t need to thumb our noses at the NCAA by hiring a guy with a cloud hanging over his head.
• Ron Zook – many South Carolina fans might cringe at the thought given the Zooker’s head coaching stint at Florida (an unmitigated disaster) and then at Illinois (less of a disaster, but then again, it is Illinois). He’s a great, great recruiter, but as an X and O man, I tend to cringe a little as well.
• Lorenzo Ward – possibly a promotion for continuity? The HBC has a lot of respect for Ward and loves him as a coach, but it ain’t gonna happen. Spurrier is going to go get someone with a pedigree, and I believe we’ll be willing to pay handsomely for it.

Two other names have been mentioned, but it appears Everett Withers will wind up at Ohio State, and Vic “Goat Boy” Koenning at North Carolina.

I’m sure contacts for our open positions will be continue to be made up until the bowl game, but don’t be surprised if neither a new DC nor a new running backs coach come on board until early January.

The Rationalization Continues. CTU writers and fans continue to downplay their three-game losing streak to the Gamecocks. The latest is a blog post from Scott Rhymer of “The Tiger Pregame Show”, entitled  “Championships are Our New Rival”.  First he pulls out the tired old “all time record” just in case we haven’t all heard that one before, then goes on to speak of CTU football as if championships are somehow a God-given right of which they have been deprived for 20 years.

You know the old saying “if one team wins all the time it’s not much of a rivalry”? Well, then championships can’t be their new rival, because championships have been kicking their ass for the last 20 years.

These pathetic rationalizations about their ACC “championship” can only provide temporary relief because…well, because 34-17, 29-7, 34-13.

Booyah.

The NCAA Cometh. Ohio State has been given a one year bowl ban, some additional scholarship reductions and an extra year of probation in addition to its previously announced self-imposed penalties. If this doesn’t make you swallow hard as a South Carolina fan then you must not be paying attention. If you look at them line by line, the indiscretions by folks “on behalf of the Gamecock program” pale in comparison to what we’ve heard about coming out of Ohio State, Miami and North Carolina. But when the NCAA is involved, you really never know what you’re going to get.

I’ll need to take a shower after admitting this, but I actually agree with Fits News when they ask Why Wasn’t Jennifer Stiles Fired? You have to take a hard line and at least APPEAR to be contrite even if you don’t believe you did much wrong. Part of that contrition should have been the termination of Jennifer Stiles.

DB U. I watched a little of the Pittsburgh-San Francisco game last night and saw Chris Culliver getting a lot of action for the 49ers. Gman brought up the fact that we should be known as “DB U” because of all the DB’s we put in the League. The list includes Culliver, Dunta Robinson (Falcons), Andre Goodman (Broncos), Sheldon Brown (Browns), Captain Munnerlyn (Panthers), Jonathan Joseph (Texans) and Darian Stewart (Rams). Fred Bennett and Ko Simpson are currently out of the league, but also spent quality time on NFL rosters recently. Not too shabby.

Merry Merry. This will probably be my last post before Christmas, so I’d like to wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas!

Tusings (Tuesday Musings) is now The Buck Sweep.  Reason #1 is I always hated the name Tusings.  Reason #2 is that name put too much pressure on me to publish on Tuesdays and I always felt a little guilty if I didn’t.  So isn’t it serendipitous that I’m posting this on a Tuesday…

If the TRC team seems unmotivated the last week or so, you’re very perceptive.  The post-Thanksgiving, pre-Christmas, non-football period is upon us and we’re a little depressed.  Don’t worry, we’ll snap out of it, but in the meantime here are a few things that have been spinning around in the Buckster’s head, beginning with Sammy’s big holiday party!

“Lady with the nicest dress will recieve 100$ to Victoria’s Secret! 100$ Bottles of Anything!”

What could possibly go wrong?!?  Uh, putting Sammy’s name on the flyer, that’s what:

The Carolina Coaching Carousel.  Jay Graham must really love Tennessee.  I mean REALLY love Tennessee.  Yes, it is his alma mater, and there’s something to be said for that.  There’s also something to be said for returning to a division contender (USC) and coaching a potential Heisman trophy candidate (21), neither of which the Vols can claim for 2012.  What the Vols can claim is a coach that’s very much on the hot seat and more instability than they’ve had in decades.  Good luck Jay, no hard feelings.

Also, I hope Junior gets the CCU job, I think it will be good training for him and if he’s successful a good stepping stone for bigger and better things. 

Finally, I sure hope Ellis Johnson stays.  You have to wonder if EJ was hoping to succeed the HBC at USC at some point, but with Spurrier’s latest contract extension maybe sees that window closing.  I feel like he’d do a fine job at USM, but I have a hunch they’ll go with a young hotshot as opposed to an older established guy like EJ.  Bad for him (I guess) and bad for SEC offenses, but certainly good for us.

Shrine On. Three USC wide receiver commitments are having a big week at Shrine Bowl practice. Lexington’s Shaq Roland sounds like the star of the bunch, and will contribute as soon as he steps on campus.  Jody Fuller and Kwinton Smith are having solid camps as well.  But can someone tell me what the heck is the deal with Quinshad Davis? Are we cool on this guy or what? He sounds like a potential star, but USC appears to be in take him or leave him mode.  Kind of like we were with this other kid out of Gaffney a few years ago…what was his name again…oh yeah, Sidney Rice.  

What is Right With Sports, Part 1. Robert Griffin III.  How impressive is this guy?  He’s obviously a great, great college football player.  But after watching the ESPN Heisman megahypefest, you couldn’t help but come away impressed with this kid’s humility, polish and poise.  He talked about what a great day it was for the “Baylor Nation”, and I’m not sure he knows the meaning of “I” or “me” when it comes to his football accomplishments.  Great job parents of RGIII.

What is Right With Sports, Part 2.  Tim Tebow.  That’s right, Tim Tebow.  For all the haters, please tell me what HE has done to make you despise him so much.  I’ll accept being a Florida Gator as an answer, but not much else.  Don’t blame Tebow for what the media has done and is doing to hype him at every turn.  Tebow is working hard, playing football and his team is winning games.  He doesn’t believe the Broncos winning has anything to do with God’s favor, despite what others may say.  Tebow is a great story in what has been a pretty mediocre NFL season.

(On a side note, what’s with people saying “God doesn’t care about a stupid football game, he has bigger things to worry about”?  So, if you believe in God, believe he created the earth, the universe, etc., do you not believe he can multitask? “Ugh, with this Greek financial crisis going on there’s just no way I’ll have time to watch the Bears-Broncos game.”  I’m not saying he favors one team or one player over the other, I’m just saying he’s not bound by human limitations, know what I mean?)

What is Wrong With Sports. Cincinnati-Xavier, that’s what.  Mick Cronin nearly pulled this situation out of the dumpster with an inspired post-game press conference, but then both schools followed it up with light suspensions for borderline criminal behavior.  The fight itself was bad enough, with Cincy’s Yancy Gates throwing cheap haymakers and prancing around like a prize fighter, but the post game comments of Xavier’s Tu Holloway (“we got a whole bunch of gangstas in the locker room”) and Mark Lyons added to the disgrace of the situation.  I know two teams I will NOT be pulling for come March.

See you guys at Sammy’s Christmas party OK?!?

For the first time in the 14-year history of the Bowl Championship Series the Atlantic Coast Conference has placed two (2) teams in BCS bowl games. As you all know, CTU was able to win the ACC Championship Game, and somewhat surprisingly Virginia Tech was given one of the BCS at-large bids and will play Michigan in the Sugar Bowl.

You know, I say “somewhat surprisingly” because the media never really brought up a second ACC team as a possibility heading to selection Sunday. But we here at TRC knew “the little conference that could” would someday break through and have two teams worthy of BCS Bowlness. So in honor of this grand accomplishment we offer our first ever ACC Power Rankings, consisting of teams within the ACC, and some teams, things and people that these squads had to overcome in the 2011 football season:

1. South Carolina – an obvious first choice. We know they’re not in the ACC, but when you beat the ACC “champs” by three touchdowns, well…just go ahead and FedEx the trophy to Columbia. We’ll melt it down and make some nice state championship bracelet charms for our supermodel girlfriends.
2. Wet Paper Bag – the switch to double wall construction really benefitted WPB this season. Word is Al Groh may be in line to take over head coaching duties in 2012.
3. Virginia Tech – it just flat out cracks us up that the “champs” beat them handily not once but TWICE this season, and are still ranked lower in the major polls. We’re not good at logic, so we’ll follow suit. LOLZ
4. Down Comforter – soft, warm and comfortable, but don’t sleep on (beneath) Down Comforter or it can smother your ass in a heartbeat.
5. NC State – beat the “champs” by 24 points, how can you possibly rank the Pack lower? It’s just stupid to rank a team lower than a team they beat, right? /brings logic back in from window
6. #OccupyWallStreet – Tenacious. Odiferous.
7. Georgia Tech – also beat the “champs”. We called Paul Johnson to congratulate him on a great season and he told us to “go #### yourself!!!” We also overheard him tell his administrative assistant the same thing when she asked him if he wanted a house salad or Caesar.
8. Clemson – should be ranked higher…aw, who am I kidding, no they shouldn’t.

9. 

   All I needed was a reason.

   Victoria’s Secret Catalog Models – mesmerizing and highly disciplined, wings cause fits for teams who like to play man-to-man.

10. Florida State – ranked preseason top 10 this year, screwed the pooch, will be ranked top 10 preseason next year, all based on their 1999 National Championship. Will also have a top 5 ranked recruiting class for the 27th consecutive year and will be given some type of trophy for no reason.
11. Wake Forest – most of the 200 students enrolled at WFU are actually on the football roster, which explains the extremely small home crowds. Jim Grobe cries himself to sleep every night thinking about all the jobs he could’ve had three years ago.
12. Stay Puft Marshmallow Man – SEC size and attitude, but ACC speed. Good thing ACC games are played in tiny stadiums and not on the streets of New York. (And if you’re a child of the 80’s, a reference that will never not be funny.)
13. North Carolina – has a team ever cheated so much to accomplish so little? Put your hand down Clemson.
14. Miami – when Ray Lewis stops using you to pimp himself on TV during bye weeks, then you know you’ve hit rock bottom. Check that, when Al Golden calls Temple and begs them to take him back, THEN you know you’ve hit rock bottom. Oh, and Nevin Shapiro.
15. Betty Crocker Yellow Cream Frosting – don’t let the color fool you, coming down off a sugar high can cause disastrous fourth quarters.
16. Boston College – yes, still has a football team, one that grows more bafflingly irrelevant every year. If not for Matt Ryan, B.J. Raji and Mark Herzlich, the B.C. football program would literally be invisible.
17. Maryland – James Franklin has a picture of you on his wall Maryland. He blocks out 30 minutes per day to point at it and laugh.
18. Inanimate Carbon Rod – see Simpsons, The.
19. Duke – was 1-7 in conference and 3-9 overall, which adds up to their best season in 52 years. Congrats Blue Devils!
20. Cumberland – still haven’t completely recovered from the 222-0 loss to Georgia Tech.

Next week we take a look at the Big East’s new powerhouse, Wonderbread.