New TRC Feature: Exclusive Recruiting Reports From Bill Cornflute

Editor’s Note:  TRC is pleased to announce that Bill Cornflute, known to all Palmetto State football fans as our very own recruiting guru, has agreed to begin sharing inside and exclusive recruiting news, otherwise known as “poop,” to our blog.  We are glad to welcome the well-respected Mr. Cornflute to the TRC family.  Below is Cornflute’s first inside and exclusive report to TRC readership.  And remember, you got this scoop here and no place else.  No one except you, and I mean no one (and that includes Clark, Newburg, Wallace, Lemming, Shurburtt, Hood, Morrell, and countless other recruitniks), has this info.  With Cornflute’s help, we are now the razor sharp part of the cutting edge.

Recruiting Report 1-23-12

By Bill Cornflute

Flip-flopper and Mulletarian Gunner Kiel

Breaking News:  Elite 11 QB Prospect and super competitive Gunner Kiel has withdrawn from Notre Dame and re-opened his recruitment-again.  After previously committing to Indiana, LSU, and Notre Dame, Kiel has decided that he wants to set the all time record for broken commitments during a recruiting season.  Upon learning that former Auburn star QB Cam Newton decommitted from five different schools during the recruiting process, Kiel has announced plans that he will commit and then de-commit to at least four more schools before signing day.  I asked Kiel why he was planning for four de-commits instead of three when three would set the record.  Kiel’s reply:  “I’m a super competitive guy.  If I go ahead and do it four more times, that sets the bar pretty high for the next guy.  I like to set records and hope I can establish one that lasts for a while.”  When asked which schools he plans to spurn next, Kiel replied:  “I’m thinking Southern Cal, Oklahoma, Stanford, and Georgia.  Those schools have produced some pretty good QB’s.  It will be fun to screw with their fan bases a little.”  When asked where he will ultimately end up playing next year after setting the de-commitment record, Kiel was, predictably, non-committal:  “I’m not really sure at this point.  There are so many possibilities out there — so many people looking for stories.  I might just keep this going for a while.”

2018 RB prospect Skyler “Pee Wee” Thompson of Atlanta, a member of the ESPN Pre-Teen Phenoms,  is drawing early attention from multiple SEC and ACC programs.  Surprisingly strong for a player measuring in at 5-2, 110 pounds, Thompson has been known to lift his friend Felix (nicknamed “Bigun”) clear off the ground when playing “Tackle the Man with the Ball” with the neighborhood kids.  Quick and nimble, Pee Wee is almost never “it” when the group plays “Manhunt” in the back yard.  Pee Wee is a Pop Warner legend, having rushed for almost 900 yards in his flag football career.   Clemson, Auburn and Tennessee have expressed some early interest in Thompson.  When pressed about his recruiting (we had to pull him away from a spirited game of Mario Cart to take our call), Pee Wee claimed to having no favorites and played things close to the vest:  “It’s still pretty early in the process.  I want to take all my visits and see what each school has to offer.  For starters, the school I choose has gotta have lots of pizza and chicken nuggets at the training table.  And eggs.  And pancakes.  I love pancakes.”

I’ll be back next week with more insider info from the recruiting trail.

bill

Advertisements
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.