How to Deal with the Modern, Angry Clemson* Fan

At last night’s Orange Bowl, Clemson* escaped Ohio State and claimed the state of South Carolina’s first ever BCS bowl victory (SUCK IT WOFFORD!). After the game Twitter exploded with some amazing hot takes about the Clemson* program, many coming from “professionals” who cover the school every day and are paid to report on said program. Hot takes like this:

Screen Shot 2014-01-04 at 11.23.02 PM

Eat it indeed. Others chose to be more verbose, albeit much less clear in exactly what they were trying to communicate:

Screen Shot 2014-01-04 at 11.23.46 PM

When a posse of twitterati and I gently asked Mr. Thurn to explain himself, he kept asking us to dispute what he was saying when we didn’t exactly understand what he was saying. So, what Clemson* “has done nationally” will somehow vault them past South Carolina, but only once the streak ends, at a time which he does not identify? I guess he believes the two BCS bowl games (ahem, 70-33) and one ACC conference title have given them a national relevance we cannot match. Our five-game win streak and higher rankings while the Tigers are making bank “nationally” are conveniently not addressed.

But I digress.

To the point – arguments with angry Clemson* fans should be easier than we’re making them out to be, even in a medium of brevity such as Twitter. The game of football is designed to match two teams, play 60 minutes, and at the end determine a winner and loser. Most of the time the winner is considered the better team, but we do encounter upsets on occasion.

But upsets between the same two teams do not happen five times in a row, especially in games determined by double-digits. The team who wins five in a  row by double digits is the better team, no matter the number of BCS games or conference championship (singular) the losing team can claim. The easiest way to win this argument is three words, or a variation of three words:

We beat you.

To illustrate, literally, I took a few minutes to mock up a hypothetical conversation between a South Carolina representative and a Clemson* representative. Feel free to print this out and hang it on your refrigerator, in your cube or office, or in the living space of a real live Clemson* fan to help them free up time to do more important things like trim their ear hair or pull their underwear out of their butt.



104 thoughts on “How to Deal with the Modern, Angry Clemson* Fan

      1. No, but we’re 24-13-1 in mine, including 4, 4-in-a-row streaks & a 3-in-a-row streak. The only question is, how long will the cocks cling to this streak when their luck goes flaccid…after decades of telling Clemson fans that “the past doesn’t matter”? I wonder what cute cartoons we’ll see then? Enjoy your time in the sun b/c you have to go back 60 years to find anything close to this kind of success.

        1. You thought the cartoon was cute? Cool, thanks! We’ll try to come up with ideas for some more. This is so encouraging!

        2. Unless we have a time machine it would be impossible to travel back 60 years. Gosh that’s silly. I don’t think the wins are based on a string of luck. It’s football. We are fortunate that our team has outplayed yours, but lucky? No. I guess you think anyone who beats your team is lucky. So does that mean that Clemson is unlucky ?

        3. No one is debating how good Clemson used to be or how not good USC used to be. If anyone ever says you to you, “60 years ago USC was better than Clemson” you are more than welcome to say “We beat you 60 years ago” and you would be correct.

          Next year, if Clemson wins, when someone says “USC is better than Clemson” you will be more than welcome to say “We beat you” and you will also be correct then.

          Today, right now:
          We beat you.

          Now, if you don’t mind, I’m going to go get sunscreen, a beach chair, and a pina coloda and enjoy the shit out of our time in the sun. (Or at least, I would if it weren’t so fucking cold outside).

    1. Yep, that game from 19-aught-9 is the one that really still stings. If that goat hadn’t chewed a hole in the ball I think we could’ve made a run.

    2. Thanks for the historic time travel back to the 19th century. Even though I love a good history lesson as much as the next football fan, being the big winner modern day is best, *hands down! Thanks Angie!

      *as in FIVE

  1. You can always tell the fans of the team that is losing today. The past is the only thing they have, and they MUST hang on to it to keep some semblance of relevance alive in their minds. As represented above. Today…This state belongs to the Gamecocks. 6 pack coming soon to a stadium near you…literally, near you, Tater. Just saying.

    1. This from a non-Clemson / non-USC fan, but you can always tell who is winning today, but not used to it because they chirp like a bunch of arrogant morons. Clearly, USC is making the most of their moment as the program is not used to this type of success. I live in SC, and it’s comical to watch the banter (which I love a treat rivalry), but both set of fans are unrealistic. Clemson fans always have way too high of expectations, and USC fans have become obnoxious over the last few years of success (they were pretty irrelevant for years, and now they’re loud).

  2. “What CU has done nationally”? He must be referring to being the source of the term “Clemsoning” which has become popular in national media.

    From Urban Dictionary:
    The act of delivering an inexplicably disappointing performance, usually within the context of a college football season.

    “Oklahoma State’s overtime loss to an unranked Iowa State was a full-blown Clemsoning.”

    We beat you.

  3. Clemson only made it to that BCS game because the ACC is the lamest football conference ever that rarely sends any representatives. Were they in a real conference (like the SEC), with 6 teams vying for 12 spots in BCS bowls, they would have played at the Mr. Clean Toilet Bowl.

  4. I must admit that I was rooting for Clemson. My seven year old asked why. Because they both can’t lose, son. I have a special contempt inside for Ohio State and a loss to CU speaks more against Ohio than it does for CU. Really, what is Clemson cheering? A come from behind fourth quarter win by less than a touchdown after 4 Ohio turnovers to a team that hones its skills on the great Illini, Hoosier and Northwestern football powerhouses? High 5!

  5. Other than national title the only BCS game most college football fans remember is the 2011 Orange bowl because of the embarrassing score 70-33 WV vs Clemson I know this to be true because I have ask plenty of college football fans from different fan base’s including Clemson fans and they have hard time answering without looking it up so my take on this if not national title then no one cares
    BCS bowl charity sytem

  6. I also enjoy pointing out that Sammy Watkins never scored a TD against USC. Followed by we beat 6 teams that won a bowl, taters beat 1. Lastly, Orange coveralls and the people that wear them are absolutely stupid.

  7. This is about the only BCS game they had to hype up, and Clemson feels the need to have SC validate this “BCS” bowl because they know they didn’t earn it. Steve Spurrier, still more relevant nationally thatn the entire Clemson program.

  8. 5 wins over Clemson defines the SC football program. Without those 5 wins, there is nothing to be a fan of. There is no hope or achievement without those wins. The fan base has grown because of the 5 wins but when Clemson wins again, there will be nothing to cling to. No championship or BCS game. The bandwagon will fall apart but look on the bright side, 50 years from now you will look back and the only thing you will remember will be the 5 straight wins.

    1. Gamecock football program will fall apart the next time Clemson beats them. Check, will be on the lookout for that.

    2. What rock do you live under? South Carolina has been one of the best teams in the best conference the last three years. We have the longest home winning streak in the nation, and our national exposure has grown significantly. I’m not sure what is in store for the program once Spurrier steps down, but if you think we are going to plummet I say you are dead wrong. It will be difficult to match the seasons we have now, but we’ll have to see who we bring in after Spurrier. Our facilities, stadium, and surrounding area have improved during the Spurrier era. The atmosphere in Williams Brice is one of the best in the nation and recruits get to see that.

    3. Aside from the best football teams Clemson has ever put together.. Tajh, Watkins, Bennett, Beasly, ect. An ACC Championship that has taken the Tigers 30 years to win, We all can agree this is the Golden Age of Clemson Tiger Football.. still unable to beat South Carolina. Im confused. What now?

    4. Actually I see it going to be at least 13 in a row since Dumbo Weenie just signed an 8 year extension…….lol. Poor clemson fans……..always living in the past because they have nothing else to cling to. They won the National Championship in 1981 and then were cited for 177 NCAA violations and given 2 years probation which was extended to 3 years by the ACC. The 177 violations were a record number by one school and that record still stands today. If any school now were found guilty of that many violations in one year they would probably get the death penalty, So Clemson fans, you have soooooooo much to be proud of ! Keep living in the past, until maybe one day, you’ll be relevant again in college football. You guys are a joke !!!

  9. Fact: 4 of the top 10 BCS ranked teams are SEC, only 1 is ACC. Fact: of the 4, Carolina is one of them. Clemson is not the 1 ACC team; they aren’t in the top ten. Fact: Clemson was just as obnoxious when they beat Carolina in the past, so obnoxious had nothing to do with being unaccustomed to winning. Fact: Carolina broke a record this year, they are the first to hold a five game win streak in the state rivalry since 1941. Fact: Clemson only played in a BCS bowl game because of the conference they are in, not because they are better according to BCS – see fact one and two. Fact: Dabo Swinney has trash-talked Carolina invoking the trash-talk he receives, just like his trash-talking fans – see fact three. Fact: Clemson is a good team; Sammy Watkins is an awesome receiver; BUT, the good team with the awesome receiver hasn’t beat Carolina in over five years; therefore, Clemson is not the better team or else there would be no 5 game streak. 1 game is a fluke or upset. 2 could be attributed to luck or injury, BUT 5 = better coaching and playing = superior team!

    1. Enjoy the 5 wins and success SC is having but it will come crashing down. They did beat Clemson 5 years in a row but the Tigers have accomplished more in those 5 years than SC has ever accomplished in the entire programs history and that’s a fact. Winning steaks aren’t remembered, Champions are. Clemson has won 7 straight times before in the rivalry but do we talk about that??? Every game is in the past just like these 5 wins.

      1. First, congratulations to the TRC staff. Apparently, you are drawing the attention of many with your excellent blogging skills.
        Kevin, thanks so much, I am enjoying our success. You know Kevin, for something to come
        “crashing down” it had to be pretty darn epic to start with, right? I’m just saying.
        Eventually, the winning streak will end as they all do. I am confident when that happens Carolina fans will survive. Maybe we can take your advice & quickly put the loss in the past. As If it never happened.
        Happy 2014 Kevin.

        1. The sad thing is, this is the best 5 years SC has ever had in their programs history. This is the peak of SC with coach Spurrier. The best teams ever and they have absolutely nothing to show for it. Not a damn thing but rings and a banner for winning 11 games. That’s what you have to be proud of. Take away the 5 wins and you have nothing but SC does play in the SEC and that makes losing every year acceptable.

        2. Kevin, it’s not a sad to be on the position we are in. It’s happy times. Happy. Happy. I imagine you would be happy with the wins too. I don’t look at it as a peak. It’s just where we are right now. Yes, Steve Spurrier is the HBC and he has done a wonderful job for the program. Isn’t that the way it’s supposed to work?
          Who knows what will happen in the future. I just appreciate the good that has come our way. It’s that simple. As for having nothing to show for it? That’s all relative. Please let me be the judge of that. What I have to show today & moving forward is PRIDE. It just feels good to be a Gamecock.

        3. Kevin – Speaking of nothing to show for it.. Why did Dabo just get signed to an 8 year contract? 1 ACC Championship in 30 years. A BCS Bowl. Still can’t beat South Carolina. Hilarious.

      2. Do you know why we don’t talk about Clemson winning 7 times in a row? Because it was in 1934-1940. I’m pretty sure you weren’t alive then, and there is a good chance your parents weren’t either. If you can’t talk about a current 5 game winning streak then when can you? Moron.

      3. The tigers have never won 11 games three years in a row. They have never beat South Carolina 5 times in a row by 10 or more points. The only thing Clemson has done over the past 5 years is lose to South Carolina. Duke should have rightfully been in the Orange bowl this year because they obviously and without a doubt were the second best team in the ACC. The only reason they didn’t go is because of the uncertainty of fan travel.

        Let me congradulate you on a BCS win, a win that no one outside of Clemson will ever remember.

      4. Wrong, those 5 games are not history as they are part of a CURRENT WINNING STREAK. Until the streak ends, then and only then is it HISTORY.

      5. Wait, did I read this right? clem5on has accomplished more in the past 5 years than the Gamecocks entire history? That statement isn’t even true for the past 5 years. Please. The best 2 teams in the history of clem5on football are the past 2 teams. Every clem5on fan I know will say that. Not only did we beat those two teams but did so with a backup QB in one of those games…at your field. It’s not even an argument. But if it makes you feel better. good foy you!

  10. I’m wondering if you guys ought to have a new segment on TRC Unleashed called “This week in WCCP” Man, that station makes me so thankful for 107.5, where they clearly favor Carolina–but aren’t over the top like that. I used to listen to them when I lives in the Upstate–and didn’t think they could get worse–but clearly–they have. Dan Scott must have not been enough of a Clem5on homer.

  11. This is fun… but it’s so trite. Honestly, our Clemson folks need to relax and get a grip on reality. We don’t care if they have orange juice or buckeye pie. If it’s what a tiger needs to feel good then, so be it. What we want it a tiger fan to get past the petty and help deal with the real problems and issues in our state like unemployment, ungodliness, and poverty. Apply your raging passion to improve the greater good. We’ll see ya there.

    1. Maybe I’m wrong, but a funny blog about sports may not be the forum to address these issues. Who’d have thought!?

  12. One day Clemson will beat us again. While I agree that we don’t have banners to hang from the past 5 years that doesn’t mean we have nothing. Over the past 5 years South Carolina as made ruffly $45,000,000 more in revenue from football then Clemson. So I promise one lost won’t take that away. Thanks SEC!

    1. for all u coots that cant do simple math that’s 23 more losses than wins……OVER TWO DECADES before ur relevant in the series

        1. cant win the east division (which was uber weak this year) b/c of losses to UGA and UT…..its pathetic that all u have is “we play in the sec” which doesnt mean sh*t when u dont win division titles, therefore no chance at the confrence title. “Theres always next year” said every coot ever

        2. Must REALLY suck to have lost five years in a row to a team with no conference titles. I feel for ya brother.

    2. Heck cootkiller, do you know what you overall record is against Georgia Tech?
      27-50-2 Now if you want a history lesson…that is called domination. Do the math.

      1. tony, in case u cant do simple subtraction thats 23 games…the same amount of games the coots trail Clemson by…..fascinating isnt it

        1. You’re obviously not a very bright guy, so to clarify, the point Tony was making is that GT owns Clemson historically which nobody without the internet would know and isn’t really relevant in any way. But we can all agree that Clemson is much better than GT in recent years and I’m sure Clemson fans are proud of that fact and it’s important. So basically “cootkiller” (creative name btw) history doesn’t matter at all, not even a little. If it did Army and Navy would still be bragging so shut up you ignorant moron and to all Clemson fans that are reading this, find a better argument or shut up until you do win. Also, We Beat You. Fear the other hand.

  13. Teams like Clemson getting into BCS Bowls because they’re in a weak conference is why the structure is being changed. USC beat Missouri, UCF, and Clemson. Obviously, the system is flawed. However, I think we “coots” will take the full hand victory over the “taters” (Surely, an actual CU grad didn’t come up with those names) over a BCS Bowl in its final year of existence. And you can keep your pride over your record from the history lesson. We’ll keep ours over our five in modern times.

  14. Really? We have nothing? Hmmmm…I think not, but whatever you Clemsux fans have to tell yourself. If your “bowl” game win was so great, then why aren’t you still out celebrating instead of arguing with Carolina fans on a Carolina blog? As for your 7 game streak, might I say it’s humorous that you have to look in the past 70+ years to come up with a rebuttal to our 5 game streak. As for your 23 extra wins, you only have 8 more than Carolina since 1941, so if 1886-1940 makes you Clemsux fans feel superior, then by all means…live 100 years in the past. We Carolina fans prefer the present. You don’t hear us talking of that time in history when y’all went 10 years with only one win against Carolina. Oh and if we’re so inferior to your bowl-game winning, only beaten by the #1 team in the nation, team, then please explain how you lost to us again this year…and no it wasn’t luck, but nice try. Our streak will come to an end as all streaks do, but unlike y’all, we won’t have to look 70+ years in the past to feel good about our team.

  15. In my opinion history is defined (in sports) by head coaching tenure. Therefore, in that context the debate is simple. . During the Spurrier era USC’s record is 6 wins and 3 losses. During the Sweeny era, Clemson’s record against USC is 1 win and 5 losses. Nuff said.

  16. Bla, bla bla. 2 SC teams have done a great job representing our state. Let’s celebrate them both.

  17. Go War Eagle….magical year, well deserved and the SEC 8th straight national championship.

    By the way the Gamecocks beat the Cotton, Fiesta and ORANGE BOWL champs this year…
    Hmmmmm…wonder why the format is going to change next year.??…could there be 5 SEC teams in the mix next year out of a final 8?? Gosh why don’t they spread it around and take soft conference champions or runners up next year when a real team plays for the title. BSC always was a joke and that is why it is now gone!

    Appreciate your thoughts above. I have been to numerous SC and Clemson games. 4 times as many Clemson games since I graduated many moons ago at South Carolina when both schools were diploma schools. Regular solid productive people who went to high school in SC and were citizens of the state without 1300 SAT scores could pay, graduate, stay in the Carolina’s and start companies or work for fortune 500 companies. We were not rednecks but not nerds who were nothing but brains.. Talk about the strenuous education all you want but if you did a W-2 or personal wealth Study on USC vs. Clemson grads it would scare you. It’s not close. Married a Clemson woman and family. We are a house divided and happily married for 26 years. My wife married up! Haaa!

    I have never seen so many backward hicks stuck in yesterday in my life at both schools. I will say we tailgated many years at CU and there are trailers in the back by the golf practice range and behind the great baseball field where people who have quit serving, working or giving back get there Tuesday. The eat, drink and talk about Danny Ford and good-ole-days for the next 4 days before the regular Pickens County Necks come down from the hills. I am SURE we have the same in a different format at Carolina. I just have too much going on to have time to travel to see the circus. If I have offended those who just don’t have a better way of spending the week, totally retired and this is all they want to do or who give lot’s back….my apologies.

    I find the worst school at wasting time on the success of others is NC State. They worry more about what the Tar Heels are doing than winning or being successful. We all know family people and folks we work with like this. Who does it more, SC or Clemson?? Don’t know but both Dabo and Spurrier sound like little baby boys fighting is a sand-pit. Grow up guys….you don’t have to prove anything to anybody. You have made millions and are highly successful GROWN men. Get over it. Makes you look like a neck on national TV.

    Rest well my fellow Tiger and Gamecock friends…..this don’t mean diddly at the end of the day!!!

    Let’s take care of our families and help somebody tomorrow.

  18. It’s funny, but when I graduated from Clemson in 1999, I actually still pulled for the Gamecocks to win when they weren’t playing us. When I look back and wonder why, I realize it’s because you weren’t really a threat to Clemson. You were kind of like a little kid brother that always wanted to be as good as his older brother but wasn’t because the older brother was taller, stronger, faster, and smarter. Occasionally you would catch a win here and there, but for the most part you were insignificant, and beating you was the norm, and really wasn’t even that exciting anymore. Then, the SEC went on the current 7 game win streak and suddenly Gamecock fans started riding the coat tails of their bigger and better brethren, claiming national titles and relevance through affiliation, even though most of the other SEC teams still wished you had never been invited to join. I can speak with confidence on this, as I attended LSU for two years before transferring home to attend Clemson.

    Then, after the great Spurrier was beaten by an interim coach in his first attempt, the Gamecocks went on the current run of 5 in a row and a lot of the fans, thumping their SEC chest, began to become insufferable, and every year it has gotten worse. The little brother has finally grown up to the point that he can now play with his older brother, has had some sustained success against him, and desperately wants his recognition for it. Well little brother, Clemson congratulates you on your recent success! You’ve finally earned your big boy pants. Remember though, big brother still knows a thing or two about playing the game and still has a lot of fight in him. When you get in his face and start the “nanny, nanny, boo boo-ing” you’re gonna tick him off and he’s gonna remind you of all the times he beat you before.

    You can’t pretend the past never happened. The fact is, everything that has happened in the past defines who we are today. There’s a reason we study history in school ( at least at Clemson, can’t speak for what passes as academia at South Carolina ), and those that don’t learn from it are “destined to repeat it.” I’m not sure who elected South Carolina fans to arbitrarily determine how far back in history Clemson fans are allowed to go, but the fact is we use history to validate current statistics every day. In fact, any statistical data are meaningless without historical, empirical data to compare them to, and the more data you have, the more accurate they are.

    So the question remains, how far back are we allowed to go? I can assure you it doesn’t have to be all the way to 1896. As recent as 1997 to 2006, the Tigers had not one, but two 4 game win streaks against the Gamecocks. I would consider that historically recent. Also, from 1997 to 2009, or the start of the current 5 game streak for the Gamecocks, the Tigers were an impressive 10-2 against the Gamecocks. 1997 is an arbitrary year though, and certainly nobody elected me as the arbitrary historical date setter. So maybe we can agree on the new Millennium? Since 2000, the Tigers and the Gamecocks are tied at 7-7, and it has taken the last 5 in a row to even make it a rivalry. So enjoy your 5 in a row little brother, you’ve earned it. While big brother has moved on to bigger and better things, he hasn’t forgotten that it wasn’t that long ago he was whippin’ your butt in the driveway. Be proud of your recent accomplishment, but if you get in my face with the “5 in a row” crap, I will politely say “hey kiddo, if you ever want to know what an Orange Bowl or National Championship Trophy looks like, there’s a couple of them in Pickens County.”

    1. If you ever want to see the rivalry trophy again….better make a trip to Columbia. How about that heisman you guys have? Whoops. Don’t step in cow dung on your way to class hillbilly

  19. Congrats cocks, y’all have finally made this game a real rivalry, and y’all still don’t know how to handle yourselves.

  20. Jitter14… Errrr, I mean, big brother, please. You have too much time on your hands. Go find a Clemson blog to post your ramblings. You should have stayed at the real Death Valley… You’re right about the history lesson, and I’ve been listening to Clemsonites get in my face about it for many years. Now, we’re winning, and CU fans hate it so much, they won’t even come watch their team get beaten at Willie B – gave back tickets.
    No doubt you’ll have your day again someday, and you’ll be just as obnoxious about it as that awful orange you wear no matter what day of the week it is, but for now, we’ll crow about our 5 – in the current decade.

  21. 65-42-4 in CU’s favor. Longest winning streak was 7 in a row by CU. Numbers don’t lie. If we can’t claim it, then November meant nothing as well.

    1. What are you talking about? I think you need to sign up for logic class. November was the current season – 2013. Of course, it means more than the past. Ask Auburn and FSU if there’s a difference between the current season and prior ones. Face it. Yes, you have a winning tradition, but when it comes to the big rivalry game, you’ve been off for 5 years.

    1. Yes you did, sir. Yes, you did. There’s no denying it. We blinked. Sincere congratulations. It changed our season.

  22. Interesting that Dabo and the Orange Clad Cult want claim that this isn’t a rivalry because they have more wins. Yet Dabo claims that they have a great rivalry with GT and GT holds a 50-26-2 margin in wins over the Tigers…isn’t that the pot calling the kettle black?

  23. Lost in all of the Clemson* and Carolina banter here is the fact that Buck is a fat, hairy, slob of a man, and no one loves him.

  24. You know I have always given credit where it is due. Congrats to USC for winning 5 in a row. With that being said, that us all you have to say for your football program! No Championship(national or conference). Who was the last famous USC NFL player? You all beat us and you have that to brag about. I am glad you at least have something for the 1st time in your schools history to brag on after a State level.

    1. Thank you Tonk, your comments and opinions expressed above are greatly appreciated, as well as your patronage. The fact you would take time out of your busy day to come to our site means a lot. Please come back any time! And click a few ads while you’re here HA HA just kidding! But seriously, keep up the good work and best of luck to the collegiate team of your choice. Have a blessed day!

  25. Who was our last famous NFL player? Are you kidding? Have you ever watched an NFL game? We have 29 and Clemsux has 22 right now. Moron.

Comments are closed.