A few snarky things from the snarkverse, snarky, snark, snark:
Florida Gator Blinn Human Being Mississippi State Bulldog Auburn Tiger quarterback Cam Newton announced today (via his employer) that he was turning pro. To say that Cam is turning pro is kind of like saying I’m turning straight (uh, I should probably add here that I’m legally married under the laws of the State of South Carolina and have two kids).
– Kentucky Wildcat WR/RB/QB/PR/Compliance Officer/Spokesperson/Equipment manager/Halftime Choreographer/Tax Preparer Randall Cobb is leaving the Cheesy Biscuits of Lexington’s Red Lobster (DRI -17) behind and will enter the NFL draft. No real snark here, just a silent ‘thank you’ to the Almighty that we’ve seen the last of #18. /arms raised and swaying.
– CTU, looking to plug holes left by
rats jumping from a sinking ship staff changes, unveiled three new members of its coaching staff: A wide receiver coach that was selling tires three years ago to coach running backs, the leader of the powerhouse Duke Blue Devil Dline, and an offensive coordinator that coached high school football less than 18 months ago. Asked to comment on the additions, Head Coach Dabo Swinney, in classic erudite fashion, said the hires were “big” and listed the other coaches he considered. [note: the other dropped names gave no corroborating statements.]
– South Carolina Wideout Demario Bennett is transferring to Coastal Carolina. In a related story, South Carolina apparently had a wide receiver named Demario Bennett.
– A reader named Ty Seale took issue with a previous TRC post, Cecil In Da House #CashMoney, so he took to twitter to offer his reasoned critique, which we reproduce here in its entirety:
We here at TRC are open to your input and thoughtful analysis. Accordingly, we’ve readdressed the Cam Newton-Paid Athlete-Auburn University-Tainted Temporary Championship-Business As Usual-Lack of Institutional Control-Impending NCAA Probe Scandal with another, more carefully produced, effort:
Hope this helps, Ty.