God Loves the Auburn Tigers . . . and Hates C.T.U.

Iím a Presbyterian.

That may be a strange way to start a blog post about college football, so let me explain.† Presbyterians have been accused of giving very little credence to the idea of free will, opting instead to attribute spiritual issues to providence or predestination.

Gene Chizik must also be a Presbyterian.† And Gene Chizikís God is a really, really, big fan of Predestined Gene Chizik and his Providential Auburn Tigers.† When ESPNís Erin Andrews approached Coach Chizik after the CTU game and asked him to explain his teamís overtime victory, Coach Chizik opined that it was attributable to divine intervention, that it was ďa God thingĒ [his words].†† Not a good week of practice, not Cam Newton’s resilience, not his teams tenacity in overcoming a 17-point deficit, but instead, it was God.

Now Iím not faulting Chizik for looking at Erin Andrews and thinking about God.† In fact, Iíve improperly used the Almightyís name a few times in reference to the comely sports reporter.† What bothers me is his apparent belief that God somehow wanted Auburn to win an out-of-conference amateur sporting contest.

Itís a ridiculous assertion, even to my Presbyterian ears.

But his theological assertions are apparently spreading throughout the Plains.† Witness Freshman RB/WR/Hype Machine Trevon Reedís recent comments about his sore kneecap: ďI wanted to question God about it, but I knew I couldn’t because He does everything for a reason.Ē††

Puuuuhhhhleaze.

Oh, and in related news, God apparently wants Chizik to hire a well-known bagman, commit multiple recruiting violations, and then proudly assert that winning is more important than playing by the rules.

The bit about God hating C.T.U.?

Well, doesn’t everybody?

Advertisements